Try, Try Again!

"The road to hell is paved with good intentions." This is one of the sayings and phrases taught in the Core Knowledge curriculum for 6th grade. It's a funny thing that I teach this phrase to my students, yet the full weight of the words hadn't hit me until recently. 

Chieko's Change has been either a burden or a forgotten element in my life. A burden in the sense that I feel convicted for not having finished and accomplished a goal I set, and a source of...shame...maybe it's shame...that reminds me of how human I am. I think the concept is great and my intentions are pure, but then life hits and so do the excuses. Then, I suppress the thoughts and feelings so much that I can forget about it altogether...that is, until something or someone reminds me.

I have continued to learn more about myself over the last year and feel as though this "burden" of Chieko's Change is really a conviction to start again. I truly do have the desire to serve others and honor Jesus with my whole life. So, if that is the case, then why am I so terrible about follow through? 

My lack of self-discipline has been something I have been facing for far too long and it is time for a change. Chieko's Change. It's time to start anew, but with baby steps this time. I mean, everyone eats an elephant the same way, right? One bite at a time. This is going to be a journey and a time for some major spiritual growth and personal development. This is going to be hard, grueling, tiring, but I can only imagine how incredible it will be to accomplish this goal. 

The goal: Complete Chieko's Change from June 1, 2013 to August 15, 2013. 

In addition, I will be throwing in my own personal growth plan for physical strength and to deepen the self-discipline lesson by training for a 5K with the intention (there's that word again) of someday, maybe, running a half marathon...or maybe even a full marathon! 

I will be signing up to run a 5K so that I have an end date to this challenge I am setting for myself. I am currently looking into running one in September. See, that is the other thing I have been learning about myself. I am great at starting, but don't really keep going because I don't know how to have a positive, planned stop. Therefore, a planned end date of August 15 and a "celebration" run in September will bring me to the end of my current goal. Eventually, I would like to complete a whole year of Chieko's Change challenges and finally obtain the original goal I set so long ago. 

So much has changed over the last two years since I had the original idea for Chieko's Change. It will be interesting to see how I fare this time. I will be sure to work on making smart goals and rallying a team of people to help support me. 

I invite you to join me in this journey. Share with me your ideas, email me what you are doing to serve and share love with others, email me messages to hold me accountable and help me persevere...please join me in whatever way you can because this is sure to be awesome! 

(Oh, and if you are that kind woman who emailed me about the scrapbook post, thank you! You have no idea how much your email meant to me and how you inspired me to start this all over again. I'd love to hear from you again!)

So, please allow me to prepare, plan, and set forth...again.

Fresh Start: Happy Birthday Daddy!

It has been almost a year to the day since my last post. I am logging in and writing this post with a lot of emotion. The human nature aspect tells me to feel shame that I quit before my goal was achieved. I feel like I need to apologize for not having continued on and persevered through in accomplishing a year's worth of giving. But then there is the other side of me. The side that knows how hard I worked over this past year and how much I gave. While my giving was not written and shared, I think I could sum it all up in one sentence. I became a teacher.

Last March was a very busy time for me in that I was searching for a teaching job and preparing to graduate from the teacher license program I was in. I knew my husband and I would be moving across town and that I had a lot of changes coming. I was frantically creating my resume and attending job fairs and interviews and finishing up student teaching. Things were great but overwhelmingly busy. As much as I hate to admit it, the busyness took over and Chieko's Change was reluctantly let go. At first I still continued to work on achieving the goal of doing something every day but just not having a chance to blog about it. Then, over time, things dwindled.

I was incredibly blessed to find a job at the perfect school for me in the exact position I wanted. This past year has been breathtakingly wonderful and incredibly challenging. I love my job but the transition took more of my time than I ever thought it would. From August to December I was frequently working until nine o'clock or later. Usually I was at work until eleven at least one night a week. I spent most of my weekends grading and preparing lessons. My time was completely out of balance. I did not spend the time I needed with my family and my health started to deteriorate slightly from not eating well, not exercising, and not having nearly enough sleep. Unfortunately, my quiet times also took a backseat. Life was so far shifted out of balance that I knew it would be hard to get it back to a healthy state but I knew I had to make the changes.

Slowly, I was able to start learning how to balance my time and energy once again.

The lessons I learned in the classroom stretched far beyond the walls of the school. I have truly grown and changed as a much stronger and wiser person. God taught me so many lessons and I am excited to share them with the world as a testament to His goodness.

Now it is March and I am entering the home stretch of school. I have survived my first year teaching and have a renewed passion for not only teaching but also living as a Christian and working toward accomplishing the goals I set a little over a year ago.

So here I am...once again...trying to start this radical change in my life through Chieko's Change. I hope you are ready to join me on the journey.

Today is a special day for me. It is my daddy's birthday; but today I will not be eating birthday cake and blowing up balloons for him. No, today I am praying to God and thanking him for the time I had with my dad. My daddy died in 1994 and even though it has been over a decade since his funeral, I still miss the heck out of him. I still remember the lessons he taught me about loving Jesus with all of my heart. My husband and I were going to drive to the beautiful Rocky Mountains and spend the day in nature worshiping and remembering my dad. (I am so blessed to have a wonderful husband who is okay just to listen or hold me while I cry. He understands that sometimes I don't know how I feel so I can't tell him, but by being with me he helps me feel comforted and loved.) Then, while we were in church I had a thought..."what would my dad do?" Honestly, my dad would have packed up the car with things and driven downtown to give all the stuff to people who needed it. He would have opened our home to someone needing a hot shower, home cooked meal, and a warm bed. He would have retreated to the mountains and spent the day in prayer like Jesus did. My dad would have worshiped and glorified God though his actions. Then it hit me! Why am I not doing that any way? Sure, I give every day in my class and I pour out my heart and love on my students and those I love, but I am not taking it to the next step and I believe Jesus has been telling me to. I have allowed the "busy" to take over the important.

I once had someone tell me that, "satan already knows he can't have your heart because it belongs to Jesus, so he will try desperately to do everything he can to keep you from the Jesus that you love. satan will keep you busy, or tired, or sick, or whatever it is that will distract you from your Creator."

(Note: I hate satan so much that I can't even bring myself to capitalize his name when I write. Yes, I know that the beginning of a sentence or a name should be capitalized and I do appreciate good grammar, but quite frankly he doesn't deserve it. This is just one of my things.)

Today is a new day. Today is my daddy's birthday. Today is a day that God made! Today is a fresh start.  So, today I will be restarting Chieko's Change.

March 6th-20th: Marching On

I am constantly amazed at how fast life can fill up. We have so much that constantly bombards us. Everything from billboards and ads on TV or the radio. Troubling news of countries that are struck with tragedy of natural disasters or human hand. So much. Every day. Wow.

But then, there are those times that I can relax in a bubble bath with a good book and forget about my skin getting pruny because I am feeling so rejuvenated by the inspirational words or messages. I did just that on Thursday night. After I started my blog, my sister told me she had a book that was perfect for what I was trying to do. She mailed it to me and encouraged me to read it. I am so glad that I did! I read "Life of a Daymaker" by David Wagner. He is the founder of Juut Salon Spa in Minneapolis. I highly recommend reading this book and taking to heart his message. Basically, his goal is to make someone's day...every day. Sound familiar? I thought so too. He had a great backstory to his mission and encouraging ideas and points to ponder. The book is also filled with great quotes to remember, write down, and read often.

March 6th to today has been a busy time for me. I have been job hunting, house shopping, lesson planning, house cleaning (okay, maybe not), and trying to keep up with everything that is being thrown my way. Luckily, I have spring break coming up. A time to rest and catch up on all of the things I have on my ever-increasing to-do list.

In the past couple of weeks I have honestly not been very good about keeping up with my challenge. I have done some things, like donating blood, donating money to support a friend who is walking in the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer, sponsored my nieces in their schools' Read-athon fundraiser, signed up for the Pound for Pound Challenge to get food for food banks, sent encouraging letters for friends who were down and out,  read for Mr. Ray, taught children's church, emailed a company about their choice to use chocolate that is not fair trade and other such things.

While I am falling behind on meeting my goal, I have to make tomorrow a fresh start. I need encouragement and support. So, if you are reading this...please hold me accountable. I need to do one thing each day and record it. I know what I have to do. Plan. If I plan what I am going to do, and I schedule things like volunteering at a soup kitchen or something, I am more likely to follow through. So, that is the goal.

Looking ahead to the week:

I am finally cutting my hair on Friday. I am going full-force and chopping off 10+ inches to donate for Locks for Love. I am excited for the change and to know that I am helping someone in a very personal way. I am looking through my list of 365 things to do to see what else I should pre-plan so this week can be successful. I'm open to ideas if you have any!!!!

Lately, I have felt like I should not blog about what I am doing, but rather what others have done for me or what I have seen others do. I have been so blessed these last couple of weeks by the generosity and kindness of others. A sales person at a store at the mall made my day by allowing me to return a defective product without a receipt. This saved me $50! Wahoo! I have seen a 7 year old boy and his mom use the horrible situation they are in to touch the lives of others. He is battling cancer and trying to collect a pillow pet for every kid in America who is ill as a way of showing God' love and providing comfort. Stories of people coming together to help with the efforts in Japan. I am seeing so much good in the world. It's been quite an amazing journey so far to see my heart changing and to view the world through a different lens. There is a song that talks about viewing the world through the eyes of God. I have been praying that prayer and trying so hard to look at things with an eternal perspective, rather than an earthly one.

So, that's it for now. I pray that this week will be successful and that I will give the glory to God in all I do.

Lots of Love!
Chieko

February 18-19: Revolve Tour

I volunteered to serve at the Revolve Tour on February 18-19. I originally volunteered because I wanted to be a part of something that I knew would be good, fun, and encouraging for girls. Then, I found out that as a volunteer, I would get two free tickets that I could give to girls to come to the event for free. How exciting! I originally asked one of my friends if she wanted to go, but she was unable to. So, I prayed and prayed and asked God to tell me who he wanted to have the tickets. I hadn't heard a name, but rather to just offer them up. So, I asked my Pastor's wife, Tracy, if she knew anyone who wanted them. The night before the event, two girls from youth group asked if they could have the tickets.

One of my friends from Bible Study and church also decided to volunteer. We were looking forward to going together and watching the Lord move in the lives of all the girls that would be there. She too brought two girls from youth group.

The Stage

My Badge

The event was awesome! I had so much fun listening to the speakers and meeting some incredible people. I even made a new friend. I was part of the usher team, so I helped escort girls to their seats and direct them to the nearest restroom, etc. I knew that this would be part of ushering when I volunteered, but I didn't know that the ushers also helped control the lines of girls waiting in line to meet and greet the artists and speakers. It was crazy! There were multiple signing times and several artists at each. The artists would sit at tables to sign the autographs. I worked the table for Britt Nicole, Kathryn McCormick, and Jenna Lucado Bishop. I had so much fun watching how excited the girls got when they met the artists. The Revolve Tour also had Chad Eastham, Hawk Nelson, Group 1 Crew, and Jamie Grace.

Shannen, Jenna L.B. Mandee, and me!

The highlight of the entire conference was when one of my youth group girls, Mandee, saw a girl who really wanted to meet Group 1 Crew but didn't have a ticket, so Mandee gave up her ticket to meet and greet. I was so proud of her! I could not believe that she would be so selfless to give up her ticket for her chance to meet the group. Actually, I could believe it. Her heart is always so kind and concerned about others, she is just that kind of person. I got an idea in my head. I wondered if there would be any way for her to meet the group backstage. I knew that Group 1 Crew was already done with their signing times. So, I asked the head of the usher crew (not his official title) if he could help me help her. I told him the story of her selfless act and he said he would do what he could. He told me to get her and bring her down to the backstage staircase. When I returned with Mandee, there was Manwell from Group 1 Crew!!! She was so excited and I have to admit that I was excited too. Watching her face light up and knowing that she got a personal meet and greet was really special.

It was so much fun to serve and to be filled up through powerful messages, beautiful music, times of worship, and being surrounded by sisters in Christ.

Marching into March

Last month seems like a blur. I am so far behind on blogging that I feel overwhelmed. So, in an effort to take a giant step forward, I am going to start my blog from March 1st. Hopefully, I will find the time to go back and fill you all in on the amazing things that happened during February. February was so fantastic and full of incredible things that I had no time to blog. But, all the more reason to tell you all about it. :0)

March 1: I was running late for an appointment. I blazed into the parking lot, threw my car into the first spot I saw and made a mad dash for the door. As I was about to break into a full on sprint, the driver of the car parked next to me asked if I would be long. I explained that I was not sure how long my appointment was but that I was running late...really late. She said, "Okay. Never mind." She turned her head away and I couldn't help but notice that something was wrong. I stopped and asked her why she was asking. It turns out her car battery died and a co-worker of hers was on the way to help jump start the battery. She was hoping to have the parking spot open so she could easily reach the two cars with the jumper cables. There really were no other parking spots open and I could certainly see her dilemma. I apologized as I ran into the building. I felt horrible. I wanted to help her but I could not afford to pay for a "missed" appointment. In that moment, that was all I could think about. As I finally entered the doctor's office, I felt a terrible burden for the lady I just met. I apologized for being late and explained the situation to the receptionist. Luckily, the receptionist was sympathetic. I excused myself and darted down to the parking lot to move my car. The lady was so thankful!

I know this is not exactly a perfect story of how I thought of others before myself, or that I jumped her car myself. Instead, it was a reminder to me that sometimes I am "that" person. You know. "That" person who is too busy to care about others, or "that" person who seems needlessly rude. "That" person who seems to not be able to give a single moment of their time to help someone who was really in need. Yes, the story ended alright, as I was able to move my car. But what a better story it would have been if I was able to express to this woman that she was more important than an appointment. Imagine how important I would have made her feel if I just took the extra moment to move my car right then. She was already stressed and I could have eliminated some rather than adding to it. Or even better, to jump her car myself. I had jumper cables with me. I know how to use them. This was a good reminder for me to stop and think about how other people see me and how my actions, or in-actions, can affect others even in the moments that I don't "have time" to think about it.

March 2: The PTA at my school does a great job. Right now we are enduring the daunting task of administering the CSAP (Colorado Student Assessment Program) and the PTA has worked hard to provide snacks for all of the students taking the assessment. I thought it would be nice to help. I have used donated popcorn from AMC Theaters in the past for youth group events, so I thought that perhaps AMC would like to donate for the students. Sure enough, they agreed to donate popcorn. I knew the students would be excited. I spoke to the coordinator of the snacks and told her about the donation. She was so excited. Evey day next week I will pick up a bag of popcorn and help eliminate some of the work from this busy PTA volunteer and to brighten the day of the students. It also makes me happy that the popcorn won't be wasted, but enjoyed by many instead.

March 3: I visited Mr. Ray and read his mail for him.

I am now volunteering to read to a blind man named Mr. Ray. I have volunteered for a little over a month now and have been so blessed to have him a special new friend. We have a good time together and he has taught me a lot about what it is like to be blind and the modifications he has to make in his daily life.

March 4: As I mentioned before, CSAP testing is currently underway. About a month ago, I went through the training required for all those who wish to proctor the test. It is a good thing I did, because there have been several times when I have been asked to proctor. While proctoring is certainly not fun, it does make me feel good that I have been helpful to the staff at my school. CSAP is stressful, and knowing that I have been able to eliminate a little stress makes me feel good. We are half way through at this point. Next week will be full of testing too.

March 5: Richard gave me some Legos that he wanted to donate. I was happy to give the Legos away to a teacher at my school. I love watching things be reused instead of thrown away. I also spent my morning cleaning the kitchen. I checked the dates on everything and purged, cleaned, and organized everything. I was so glad that I was able to recycle a lot of things instead of just trashing them.

While I am happy to share these things, I also feel that I must share with you how my family was blessed this week.

Maile at Christmas

My best friend, Amy, agreed to let our dog out. This was a huge blessing as my husband and I did not want to pay the money for doggy daycare. Amy has been great about taking care of our pup and also sending me reassuring text messages. Usually, when someone in the family is out of town, Maile gets sick or acts strangely. It has been so nice to not worry about Maile. Last night, my husband read on Amy's facebook page that her daughter has been ill. I had no idea! Amy never mentioned anything and she still took care of our baby. Amy is always so selfless and kind. She truly was a blessing to my family this week.

Well, that's it so far. Like I said, I will do my best to go back and fill everyone in on February. But for now I will just keep my goal at staying caught up from here on out.   Hugs and love, Chieko   :0)

Time Flies!

My last post was January 23rd. I had just gone to the Life and Justice Conference and I promised to fill you in on all that I learned. I am so sorry that I have been terrible about blogging. I am pleased to say that I have been too busy "doing!" It's a good problem though, don't you think? I will post about the conference on a separate post. This post is to share some of the happenings of the last month.

Admittedly, I have done something everyday but I have not logged what those things were. Here is a list of some of the things I have done to keep my challenge going:

1. Gave a hungry student food
2. Cleaned a toilet for someone else
3. Cleaned someone's home
4. I am now reading mail each week for Mr. Ray, a blind man (this will be on-going)
5. Spoke at a youth group about choices and the love of Jesus
6. Joined the "Missions Team" at church (this will be on-going)
7. Volunteered to teach Children's Church (this will be on-going)
8. Provided groceries for someone in need
9. Returned stray grocery carts from the lot so they wouldn't hit anyone's car (in the freezing Colorado weather!)
10. Volunteering at the "Revolve Tour" (2/18-19)
11. Donated tickets to "Revolve Tour" to two girls from youth group
12. Raising awareness about human trafficking with everyone and anyone who will listen
13. Apologized and sought forgiveness from someone
14. Provided a ride to someone in need
15. Planned a screening of the documentary "The Dark Side of Chocolate" and have worked hard to get a Fair Trade chocolate company to donate chocolate. The screening is on February 26th at 7pm!

January 15-23: Catching Up

I have found it very challenging to find the time to blog over the past week. So, I will do my best to remember what things I have done and to share with you the experiences I had that I wanted to remember to share with you.

I last sat down at my computer on January 15th but I did not blog about the events of that day. It is from that day that I will begin.

January 15: Write a letter to my sponsored child from Compassion International. (Link to Compassion)

January 16: Volunteer to provide cookies for the meal my church is serving at Open Door Ministry in downtown Denver. (Link to CATR and Link to Open Door Ministry). This ministry serves the homeless and needy in Denver with a church service, fellowship and a delicious, hot meal. The person coordinating the meal was getting a bit frantic about the lack of volunteers to provide food. Once I heard the need, I immediately volunteered. This was a lesson on doing something myself instead of thinking (or wishing) that someone else would do it. I did not see the sign up get passed around so I had thought that the sign up was already complete. Instead, I just kept missing it. I should have just inquired instead of assumed. I am happy to report that the sign-ups were filled and all of the food needed was provided. Way to go church! :0)

January 17: MLK Day! When I was at the grocery store, I took some extra time to wrangle up some of the carts left out in the parking lot. People were leaving them all over the place making it difficult to park. I felt like the opportunity presented itself to do something good. Turns out, one of the grocery cart attendants saw me. He came up to me with a look of shock on his face and thanked me. Not only did I help make sure cars were not going to get hit, but I helped him out too. It was a little thing, but it made a difference.

January 18: This was my first day of school for student teaching. I had a great day getting to know my students and getting my feet wet in the new school. After school, I was so blessed to find emails, text messages, Facebook posts, and voicemails inquiring about and wishing me well for my first day. I was so touched! My "thing" for the day was to learn as many names as possible and to learn at least one thing about each person. Sure, I am going to learn about my students' academically, but I also want to know them as unique individuals. Their likes, dislikes, friends, family, and other things that are important to them should also be important to me. I believe this is one way I can be sure to really love my students and to help them succeed. While I did not get to know all of the students, I certainly made good headway. (As of Friday, I learned all of the students in my homeroom and most of the students in the other classes as well. I'm making progress!) I was really touched by one particular student who offered to stack my chair for me. It was a small gesture but it really brightened my day. I made sure to tell him so.

January 19: I was surprised to see so much snow on the ground as I left school. The roads were really icy and it seemed as if everyone was on the road trying to get home. Instead of getting frustrated about the snow, traffic, or how long it was taking me to get from point A to point B, I spent the time in prayer. I prayed for all of the people on the roads to be safe and to get to their destinations without frustration. As I got closer to home, my heart broke as I saw a car on the side of the road laying on its top with bits and pieces scattered for quite a distance. I knew this accident was very serious--probably fatal. I prayed and prayed and prayed. I also prayed for those who were without heat or shelter. My "thing for the day" didn't come until much later, however. I went to pick my husband up at the Light Rail station and saw another man cleaning his car off with his bare hands. I offered to clean it off for him or to loan him my snow brush. He seemed thankful for the offer but kept clearing the snow. I offered for him to sit in our warm car as his warmed up. Again, he declined. Even though my offers were declined, I still did my part to try to help care for another person. That is, after all, all that I can do.

January 20: I ran into a friend of mine at a local coffee shop. She told me that she just had to put her dog to sleep. I couldn't help but empathize with the pain she was feeling. My husband and I were on a date night, but we both knew that our conversation could wait until later, as my friend needed a listening ear that was free from distraction. (How many times have I tried speaking to someone only to feel like they were not even giving me their undivided attention?) I think it is so important to live according to my priorities and at this moment, she was a priority. She was a "walnut." I was sure to follow up with her too, to let her know I would be there for her.

January 21: One lesson I have been learning about is that of accountability. Garrett spoke about it in his sermon, I have been learning about it first hand through this challenge, and also through scriptures I read in my quiet times. I was faced with a situation where a dear friend of mine needed to be held accountable. Holding someone accountable can be so scary! Man, I was shaking...at least on the inside. But, I do believe that scripture is clear on things and we need to hold each other accountable in loving ways. No judgment. No justification of wrong. Truth and love. Simply done with truth and in love. So, I found myself speaking truth to her and praying that the Lord would speak through me and use me as a messenger. I had to be bold and honest, but again I knew that the message needed to be shared in love and with open arms. How often is the church presented with an issue (cursing, homosexuality, adultery, lying, cheating...) and we do not approach the issue with love. Rather, we judge and cast aside those who need the healing hand of God or the grace of God to touch their lives and to be embraced by those who call them friend. Man, this issue is near and dear to my heart as I have been going through some learning curves with this topic. How do I tell my non-believing friends about the love of Jesus when all they see are the shortcomings of the church? I know I sound preachy. I'm sorry. I just have to learn to really let the scripture of "Love thy neighbor as thy self" sink in to a level that is so deep that it becomes part of my very being; my core and essence of who I am even. It is in that true love that we can hold each other accountable in the way that I believe Jesus really intended. So, today's "thing" was holding someone accountable with love and grace. In the end, I bought her a cup of coffee, prayed over her, and loved on her for the rest of the night. I will continue to pray for her and to try to encourage her too.

January 22: I attended the Life and Justice Conference and volunteered with a friend. It was great to serve and be a part of the event. I will be writing a completely different post for this event and day because it simply deserves a whole post to itself. AMAZING and very eye-opening. Thing for the day was to volunteer and I also learned about the issues of human trafficking and genocide. Now, it's time for me to share what I learned with the world. Stay tuned...

January 23: Today, I was a busy girl. I dropped of the cookies for the Open Door Ministry and I was hard at work sharing all that I learned about human trafficking and planning a screening of a movie I learned about at the conference. The movie is "The Dark Side of Chocolate." The gal I went to the conference with and I are going to be hosting a screening and Fair Trade Chocolate party. If you want more information, just ask.

Well, that's it for now. I have finally caught up! Whew! I will be back to share everything about the Life and Justice Conference, but for now it's time for bed. Tomorrow I go back to school. I am so excited to see my students and I look forward to another great week ahead. I pray that the Lord will bless you this week and draw you closer into a deeper relationship with him. If you don't know the Lord Jesus as your personal savior and you want more information, please don't hesitate to ask me. I would love to share his love with you so you can know him too. Here's a link for you too.

Much love and sweet dreams, Chieko