Daily Bread

"In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said: 'It is more blessed to give than to receive.' " Acts 20:35 (NIV)

Sunday, March 18, 2012

Fresh Start: Happy Birthday Daddy!

It has been almost a year to the day since my last post. I am logging in and writing this post with a lot of emotion. The human nature aspect tells me to feel shame that I quit before my goal was achieved. I feel like I need to apologize for not having continued on and persevered through in accomplishing a year's worth of giving. But then there is the other side of me. The side that knows how hard I worked over this past year and how much I gave. While my giving was not written and shared, I think I could sum it all up in one sentence. I became a teacher.

Last March was a very busy time for me in that I was searching for a teaching job and preparing to graduate from the teacher license program I was in. I knew my husband and I would be moving across town and that I had a lot of changes coming. I was frantically creating my resume and attending job fairs and interviews and finishing up student teaching. Things were great but overwhelmingly busy. As much as I hate to admit it, the busyness took over and Chieko's Change was reluctantly let go. At first I still continued to work on achieving the goal of doing something every day but just not having a chance to blog about it. Then, over time, things dwindled.

I was incredibly blessed to find a job at the perfect school for me in the exact position I wanted. This past year has been breathtakingly wonderful and incredibly challenging. I love my job but the transition took more of my time than I ever thought it would. From August to December I was frequently working until nine o'clock or later. Usually I was at work until eleven at least one night a week. I spent most of my weekends grading and preparing lessons. My time was completely out of balance. I did not spend the time I needed with my family and my health started to deteriorate slightly from not eating well, not exercising, and not having nearly enough sleep. Unfortunately, my quiet times also took a backseat. Life was so far shifted out of balance that I knew it would be hard to get it back to a healthy state but I knew I had to make the changes.

Slowly, I was able to start learning how to balance my time and energy once again.

The lessons I learned in the classroom stretched far beyond the walls of the school. I have truly grown and changed as a much stronger and wiser person. God taught me so many lessons and I am excited to share them with the world as a testament to His goodness.

Now it is March and I am entering the home stretch of school. I have survived my first year teaching and have a renewed passion for not only teaching but also living as a Christian and working toward accomplishing the goals I set a little over a year ago.

So here I am...once again...trying to start this radical change in my life through Chieko's Change. I hope you are ready to join me on the journey.

Today is a special day for me. It is my daddy's birthday; but today I will not be eating birthday cake and blowing up balloons for him. No, today I am praying to God and thanking him for the time I had with my dad. My daddy died in 1994 and even though it has been over a decade since his funeral, I still miss the heck out of him. I still remember the lessons he taught me about loving Jesus with all of my heart. My husband and I were going to drive to the beautiful Rocky Mountains and spend the day in nature worshiping and remembering my dad. (I am so blessed to have a wonderful husband who is okay just to listen or hold me while I cry. He understands that sometimes I don't know how I feel so I can't tell him, but by being with me he helps me feel comforted and loved.) Then, while we were in church I had a thought..."what would my dad do?" Honestly, my dad would have packed up the car with things and driven downtown to give all the stuff to people who needed it. He would have opened our home to someone needing a hot shower, home cooked meal, and a warm bed. He would have retreated to the mountains and spent the day in prayer like Jesus did. My dad would have worshiped and glorified God though his actions. Then it hit me! Why am I not doing that any way? Sure, I give every day in my class and I pour out my heart and love on my students and those I love, but I am not taking it to the next step and I believe Jesus has been telling me to. I have allowed the "busy" to take over the important.

I once had someone tell me that, "satan already knows he can't have your heart because it belongs to Jesus, so he will try desperately to do everything he can to keep you from the Jesus that you love. satan will keep you busy, or tired, or sick, or whatever it is that will distract you from your Creator."

(Note: I hate satan so much that I can't even bring myself to capitalize his name when I write. Yes, I know that the beginning of a sentence or a name should be capitalized and I do appreciate good grammar, but quite frankly he doesn't deserve it. This is just one of my things.)

Today is a new day. Today is my daddy's birthday. Today is a day that God made! Today is a fresh start.  So, today I will be restarting Chieko's Change.